Abortion
Medical procedure to end an unwanted pregnancy. In early stages it usually involves taking tablets, but may also involve a small operation under local anesthetic. You must have the procedure before the 24th week of your pregnancy. For advice, you might want to visit the BPAS service. Also known as: Termination
Abuse
Abuse can take different forms, the most common being physical, emotional or sexual. Physical is when someone is mistreated physically by being pushed around or hit. Emotional could be through intimidation, threats, being called names and put down. Sexual is being forced to do something sexually that you don’t want to do. Abuse is never acceptable in any type of relationship. If you’re suffering from abuse you can get help or speak to the people at BSCB or CEOP
AIDS
Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome. AIDS is a medical condition, caused by the HIV virus. A person is said to have AIDS when their immune system is too weak to fight off infections due to the damage caused by HIV.
Find out more about HIV/AIDS and other STI s.
Amaurophillia
A fetish when someone gets turned on by blindfolding their partner.
Anal
A type of penetrative sex that generally involves putting something up a person’s bum be it a finger, penis or sex toy. If you are going to have anal sex make sure you use lots of lube and lots of patience, as it takes a while for your body to adjust otherwise it can be painful. And always use a condom as it is very easy to pass STIs on during anal sex.
Also known as: Bum sex
Analingus
More commonly known as rimming – involves licking a partner’s bum hole. Sounds disgusting, but can feel very nice as there are lots of nerve endings there. However, ensure they have good personal hygiene and if you haven’t both been tested for STIs, use dental dams to prevent passing on infections.
Also known as: Rimming
Androgynous
Or gender neutral. This is used to describe a person who cannot be easily distinguished as a male or female.
Androminetophilia
A fetish when guys like to have sex with girls dressed as boys
Anus
The proper term for the opening in your bottom
Also known as: Bum-hole, chocolate starfish, ring piece, ring.
Apodysophilia
An over enthusiastic desire to take your clothes off, often at inappropriate moments.
Arabian goggles
Is where a guy sits on his partner’s face, with each testicle resting in each of their eye sockets with their penis running along their nose. Arabian Night Goggles is when this is done to an unsuspecting sleeping partner.
This is a somewhat pointless act that has very little benefit in practice. What’s more, if it is actually done to someone that is asleep they cannot be considered to have consented and could be deemed as an act of sexual assault, not so funny now is it?
Areola
The browny-red dark circle around your nipple.
Asexual
A recognised alternative sexual orientation. If someone identifies as asexual it tends to mean that they are not interested in a sexual relationship with anyone. It’s not that they haven’t found the right person yet, they just aren’t interested in sexual relationships. However, they may still have strong romantic relationships, and can experience sexual pleasure.
Some asexuals also report having no sex-drive or gain no pleasure from sex itself, however this is not exclusive.
Axillism
Sexual act, where a guy will rub his penis under his partner’s armpit.
Also known as: Bagpiping
Bagpiping
The common term for axillism – the sexual act of having sex with a partner’s armpit. The penis is put under the arm and held in place like a bagpipe
Balls
Not merely sporting equipment. Also a common term for a guy’s testicles. Find out more about balls on the Changes for Boys page.
Also known as: Bollocks, Family Jewels.
Banjo String
The more common term for the frenulum – the small stringy connective tissue that attaches the foreskin to the underside of the penis. This is often very sensitive to touch and feels nice, but is also very delicate and can be damaged if you are too rough with it.
Bartholin Glands
The little glands hidden inside the vagina that make girls nice and wet when they get turned on. They react just like your salivary glands in your mouth, when you think of food your mouth waters – helps lubricate the vagina to get ready for sex.
Find out more about Changes for Girls.
Bi-Sexual
Sexual orientation is about who you fancy and turns you on. Bisexual people fancy both sexes – both guys and girls.
For support on sexual orientations – you can find out more about coming out and also get in touch with BLAGY and SOUND
Also known as: Bi, swing-both-ways,
Blow Job
Term for performing oral sex on a guy. Ridiculously, it doesn’t involve blowing (a willy is not a musical instrument!) It more commonly involves licking, kissing and sucking the guy’s penis.
Also known as: Head, Giving Head, Oral, Sucking Off
Blue Balls
‘Blue balls’ is the term that guys use to describe the ache in their testicles when they get all excited and yet don’t ejaculate.
For a time guys used to use this as an excuse to try and get sex or a hand job from their partner, claiming that it would do them serious damage if they didn’t help them cum, causing everything from cancer to infertility if they didn’t.
When a guy gets turned on, the arteries carrying blood to his genitals enlarge, whilst the veins constrict. This uneven blood flow is what causes him to get an erection and his testicles to swell too. If he cums, everything quickly goes back to normal as the blood flow is released and the veins and arteries return to normal capacity.
However, if he doesn’t cum then occasionally the blood flow remains trapped for some time, causing a dull ache or heaviness in his testicles. This sensation is what is commonly known as ‘blue balls’ due to the bluish tint that appears when deoxygenated blood is trapped in the vessels of the testicles. It is a temporary occurrence and does not cause cancer, infertility or any other permanent problems.
Blue waffles
A slang term for nasty looking genitals infected with a host of different sexually transmitted infections. However, as with most slang terms their meaning gets distorted over time. It also refers to bruising from rough sex.
Bollocks
Another common term for a guys testicles or balls. Often used to describe someone who is brave – ‘he’s got bollocks’, or something very good – the ‘dogs bollocks!’
Find out more on the Changes for Boy’s page.
Also known as: Balls, testicles, family jewels
Boner
Is another term for an erection, humans don’t actually have a bone in their penis. An erection is caused by an increase in blood-flow in to the spongy tissue inside the penis.
Boobs
Another name for breasts, which come in all different shapes and sizes. Whilst they might be nice to look at, technically breasts are for feeding babies. However, they only start to produce milk towards the end of pregnancy.
Also known as: Breasts, Melons, Bazookas, Tits, Baps
Bucket
There is a myth that if a girl sleeps around she will develop a ‘bucket fanny’. The idea is that her internal muscles will be stretched by having too much sex. This is not only highly offensive but is more importantly completely inaccurate.
There is this ridiculous notion amongst men, which often comes from pornography, that a girl should feel really tight and this is a good thing. In actual fact if a girl is really tight it is a sign that she is not turned on and isn’t really enjoying herself. As part of female sexual response the muscles in the vagina relax and open up to make it easier for a penis to fit inside. The only thing big enough to stretch the vaginal muscles is a baby’s head which is over 15cm across, if your penis is this big you would pass out from the loss of all the blood it would take to fill it.
To find out more about girl’s bits in Changes for Girls
Bukakee
This is a term usually found only on pornography and adult sex sites. It refers to a sexual practice where a woman will generally kneel in a circle of men who will one-by-one ejaculate (cum) all over her face and body. Some people are horrified by the idea of this action and see it as degrading, where as others who chose to partake say that it is a liberating experience.
CASH
Stands for Contraception And Sexual Health. It is a service that provides contraceptive advice and helps you to find the right method that works for you. They also provide other services such as testing for sexually transmitted infections, pregnancy testing and emergency contraception.
Whilst you are perfectly entitled to visit your GP to get contraceptive advice and treatment, generally, as CASH is a specialised service they tend to be the best places to go. All Bradford district sexual health and contraceptive services are young people friendly and have reached the You’re Welcome Quality Criteria for Young People’s Services.
Cervical Screening Test
Cervical screening tests are offered to women from the age of 25, every three years. A cervical screening test (or ‘smear test’) is a method of detecting abnormal cells in the cervix in order to prevent cervical cancer. The cervical screening test usually takes around five minutes to carry out. The doctor or nurse puts a small instrument, called a speculum, into the vagina to hold it open. A small brush-like instrument is then used to collect some cells from the surface of the cervix. These cells are transferred into a small container of liquid, and sent away for the cells to be transferred onto a slide and examined under a microscope. Whilst it doesn’t hurt, a smear can be both uncomfortable and embarrassing for many women. However, don’t be put off – a few minutes of feeling uncomfortable might save your life.
Cervix
The opening to the womb, found at the top of the vaginal canal. This is what they check when a young woman has a smear test.
Find out more on the Changes for Girls page.
Child Sexual Exploitation or CSE
Child Sexual Exploitation is a term you may have heard in the news recently. It is a bit of a hot topic at the moment.
CSE is where someone takes advantage of you sexually by making you think they have feelings for you or love you, or by giving you gifts, food or accommodation.
They may have power over you and use threats or violence, so they can get you to perform sexual acts for them or for others.
Also see Grooming and Trafficking…
Chlamydia
Most common sexually transmitted infection. Often has no symptoms, and is easily passed on through manual, oral and penetrative sex. Can be cured with antibiotics. Can cause infertility if left untreated in both men and women.
To find out more read our STI pages
Chode
A penis that is wider than it is long (highly unlikely) – or more generally a very wide chunky penis.
Circumcision
This is a procedure that is often performed on infant boys for religious or cultural reasons. It involved the removal of the foreskin, the flap of protective skin that covers the sensitive head of the penis. At one time it was done as people believed that it was more hygienic, however as long as a boy or young man has good general personal hygiene then there is no real benefit. Occasionally a boy or young man may have to have a circumcision due to medical reasons, that there is an infection or the skin is too tight, however this is fairly rare.
Currently there is a lot of argument around as to whether non medical circumcision should be allowed to be performed. Many protesters see the procedure as wholly unnecessary and as the head of the penis develops scar tissue as a means to protect itself once the foreskin has been removed argue that it is against the child’s human rights to have it performed when they are too young to decide for themselves whether they want the procedure.
This argument has partly come around due to the rise in awareness of Female Circumcision which is rightly classed as illegal and against human rights. To find out more about FGM
Cis
Is a term used mainly by people who work within the arena of gender identity. It basically means ‘not trans’ – so this means that your gender (how you identify yourself) and the gender you were assigned with at birth match up. It is a term designed to be more inclusive for everyone and move away from terms like ‘normal’.
Clap (the)
A term that isn’t used so much these days but is a general term for an STI. It has now been replaced with other terms such as blue waffles.
Clitoris
A sensitive little pea sized organ found underneath a little hood where the vaginal lips meet at the top of the vulva. It is tucked away as it is very sensitive (and acts like the head of a guy’s penis) can feel very nice to touch, but be gentle!
Read more about Changes for Girls.
Also known as:
Clit, Man-In-The-Boat, Flick The Bean,
Clunge
Another name for girly bits! Made infamous by the Inbetweeners.
Also known as
Fadge, Fanny, Pussy, Vulva, Twat, Yoni
Cock
Another name for a guy’s penis.
Also known as
Dick, Nob, Penis (Technical), One-Eyed-Trouser-Snake, Purple-Headed-Dragon
Coil
More common name for an IUD (intra uterine device). A form of long acting contraception.
Find out more about the coil in the contraception section.
Also known as
IUD
Combined Pill
Contraceptive pill that contains a combination of oestrogen and progesterone, hormones which help control a girl’s menstrual cycle. Must be taken daily for 3 weeks (then one week off) to prevent pregnancy.
Find out more about the pill in the contraception sections of this website.
Also known as
The Pill
Condom
A latex or plastic sheath that fits over a guy’s penis. The only form of contraception that prevents against both pregnancy and STIs.
Find out more about condoms in the contraception sections of this website.
Also known as
Jonnie, Rubber, Rubber Jonnie, Nodder.
Confidential
A term professionals use to mean that anything you tell them is private or secret. They will not pass on any information to anyone else (including parents) without your say-so. People take this very seriously and would only ever break this promise if they thought a young person was in danger of being hurt or hurting someone else.
Contraception
Something that is taken or used to prevent pregnancy. Including the pill, implant, condom, femidom, IUD.
Find out more in the Contraception sections of this website.
Also known as
Protection
Coprophilia
or Scat is the fetish of being turned on by playing with your own or your partner’s faeces (poo).
Corona
Part of the head of a guy’s penis. It is the little ledge at the bottom of the head of the penis (glans or bell end) can often be one of the most sensitive parts of a guy’s penis
Find out more about Changes for Boys.
Crabs
The more common name for pubic lice. These little creatures are like head lice, except they are found in your short and curlies not the hair on your head. Anywhere you have pubic hair, you can have crabs. They are an STI passed on by body to body contact.
Find out more about pubic lice on the fpa website.
Also known as
Lice, Pubic Lice
Cum/Come
1. Another word for orgasm as in “I’ve cum!”
2. Can also be another word for sexual fluids, both semen in guys and vaginal fluid in girls.
Also known as
1. Ejaculated, Orgasmed, Got Off
2. Jizz, Spunk, Vaginal Fluid, Semen
Cumming/Coming
Another term for orgasming. An emotional and physical response to the build up of all those nice feelings during sex . However, sex does not guarantee an orgasm – they are produced by the brain, so you have to be in the right frame of mind for it to happen.
Also known as
Orgasms
Cunnilingus
Technical term for performing oral sex on a woman. Oral sex involves kissing, licking and sucking a partner’s bits. It is a very intimate act and can be very pleasurable as most of a woman’s most sensitive bits, her clitoris and vaginal lips, are on the outside.
Find out more about Changes for Girls.
Also known as
Going Down, Licking Out, Giving Head, Muff Diving, Carpet Munching, Drinking From The Fury Cup
Cunt
Often used as an offensive swear word, however it’s an old fashioned term for female genitalia (female sexual bits).
Also known as
Vulva, Clunge, Fanny, Fadge, Minge, Pussy, Twat
Daisy Chaining
Daisy Chaining: can have one of two meanings.
1. Originally it involved three or more people each performing and receiving oral sex simultaneously, For example, A would be kissing/licking B’s bits, B licking Cs and C licking A’s creating a circle or chain. In this way each partner is giving and receiving pleasure at the same time.
2. However, Daisy chaining has also come to describe a second scenario where a young woman sits in the middle of a circle of guys and gives them each oral sex (a blow-job) in turn.
If young women have been bullied and coerced into performing daisy chains it is considered a sexual assault. There is a huge difference between doing something by choice because you get off on it and doing something because you are in a situation where you feel there is very little choice.
Dental Dam
A super thin piece of (often flavoured) latex that can be spread over a girl’s vulva (bits) before performing oral sex to prevent the transmission of STIs – they are the female equivalent of a flavoured condom. Dams can also be used for rimming, as you can also transmit STIs when licking bums too.
Dick
Common term for a man’s penis.
Find out more about Changes for Boys.
Also known as
Penis, Cock, Nob
Discharge- vaginal
The vagina, just like your mouth is nice and moist, this is to help keep it clean and healthy. A girl’s discharge is usually the consistency of uncooked egg whites however it is common for it to get creamier and thicker as she moves through her menstrual cycle. This is perfectly natural. The only time a girl might need to worry is if it suddenly changes colour or starts to smell badly, as this could be a sign of infection.
Doggie Style
A sexual position where,one person mounts another person from behind just like they do in nature programmes.
Also known as
Taking From Behind
Dogging
Usually refers to people meeting in public places such as parks or car parks to have sex and watch others doing so.
Domestic Abuse
In March 2013 following a white paper which investigated ‘Violence against Women and Girls’ VAWG), the official definition of domestic abuse was changed to include:
‘Any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between those aged 16 or over who are or have been intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality. This can encompass but is not limited to the following types of abuse: Psychological, physical, sexual, financial, emotional’.
Domestic abuse or relationship abuse, is not just limited to physical violence, like punching or kicking – if you are threatened with violence, or have no say over what you wear or who you see or speak to, or are constantly criticised, checked up on or feel scared in any way – it is still abuse. CEOP and Childline have more information about relationship abuse and how to get support.
Donkey Punch
Donkey Punch
Another urban myth. This refers to the practice of hitting a partner whilst having sex doggie style (especially anal sex), on the back of the head. Supposedly it is meant to cause a involuntary nervous reaction where their muscles will clench tighter. This is simply nonsense, and could in practice be very dangerous. It is also a form of physical abuse and is considered to be a physical assault, which is a crime.
Double Dutch
Safest approach to using contraception for a heterosexual couple. The man will use a condom to protect against STIs, whilst the woman will also be on hormonal contraception to protect against pregnancy, even if the condom splits.
Find out more about Contraception .
Drag
The act of dressing up in gendered clothes as part of a performance. Drag Queens perform dressed up in highly feminine clothes; Drag Kings in highly masculine clothes. However, Drag acts do not indicate a person’s gender identity or sexual orientation.
Dry Humping
Sexual activity where partners rub and grind against each other (usually fully clothed) whilst making out. Very common first sexual experience for many young people as there are few risks involved and can feel good.
Also known as:
Paper Sex, Tribbing (2 Girls Unclothed), Scissoring, Scissor Sisters; Frotting (Boys Unclothed), Cock Fencing
Egg Cell
The female half of making a baby, the egg cell is the biggest cell in the human body. It carries half of the genetic information (the instructions) for making a baby; the other half comes from a guy’s sperm cell.
Ejaculation
When semen shoots out of a guy’s penis due to sexual stimulation (or wet dream). Can be accompanied by an orgasm (nice feelings) but not always.
Also known as:
Cum, Cumming, Shot Their Load, Spunked, Jizzed
Emergency Contraceptive Pill
If you have had unprotected sex this can prevent pregnancy. It is a tablet which contains a high dose of hormones, which must be taken within 72 hours of sex (earlier the better). In Bradford ellaOne is also available which works up to 5 days after unprotected sex.
Find out more about the Emergency Hormonal Contraceptive Pill,
Also known as
Morning After Pill, EHCP, ellaOne
Enthusiastic Consent
Enthusiastic consent, is what makes sex great. It is the difference between having sex because you really want to and because you feel you should.
Everyone knows that when you force some to have sex it is called rape – however, people often have sex because they feel pressured, that it is expected of them or that they feel they can’t say no – whilst not everyone would recognise this as rape – we can all agree that it isn’t right.
Great sex happens when all involved are doing it because they want to and that they enjoy it. So the question remains – do you (and your partner) enjoy the sex you have? if not perhaps they are going through the motions rather than showing enthusiastic consent.
Epididymis
The wiggly tube on the back of the testicles where sperm are stored after coming off the production line in the testicles, ready for action and ejaculation.
Find out more about Changes for Boys
Eproctolagnia
Is a fetish, when you are turned on by people farting.
Erectile Dysfunction
The medical term for a guy being unable to get or maintain an erection. This can be for medical reasons (such as high blood pressure) or often due to emotional distress, so seek help and talk about it.
Find out more about erectile dysfunction.
Also known as
Limp Dick, Impotent, No-Lead-In-His-Pencil
Erection
Typical male sexual response, when a guy’s penis fills with blood, getting longer and harder ready for sex
Also known as
Stiffy, Hard-On, Bone-On (There’s no bone though)
Fadge
A term for female genitalia – combining ‘fanny‘ and ‘vagina‘.
Find out more about Changes for Girls.
Also known as
Cunt, Clunge, Fanny, Minge, Pussy, Twat, Vagina, Vulva
Faggot
An offensive term for a gay man. Also used to describe a weak or ‘girly’ lad.
If you are gay, have been called this, or need some support Yorkshire Mesmac and Equity Partnership run support groups for gay and bi sexual men and women,
Also known as
Homosexual, Poof, Queer
Family Jewels
A slang term that refers to a guys’ testicles.
Find out more about Changes for Boys.
Also known as
Balls, Bollocks, Testicles
Fanny
Another term for the female genitals. Americans use it to mean bottom and bum – so watch out for the difference!
Also known as
Clunge, Fadge, Fanny, Minge, Pussy, Vagina, Vulva, Twat, Yoni
Fellatio
Technical term for a blow job or oral sex performed on a man. Typically involves, licking, kissing and sucking a guy’s penis.
Also known as
Blow Job, Head
Female Ejaculation
Yes females can ejaculate too! There is a little gland hidden away about two inches inside the vagina or G-spot, when this is rubbed it can feel very nice and when stimulated a woman may ejaculate a clear fluid from the urethra (but it’s not wee).
Find out more about Changes for Girls.
Also known as
Squirting
Femidom
A female condom which is a plastic ‘sock’ that fits inside the vagina and protects against STIs and pregnancy.
Fertility
Refers to the ability to make and have babies. Fertile means you are able to make babies, infertile means you are unable to conceive.
Fetish
Technically a fetish is classified as a ‘sexual deviance’, which doesn’t really explain anything. In its simplest terms a fetish is when someone is turned on by something ‘non-sexual’ or something abnormal – such a feet or dressing in uniforms. Feet are not what we call a ‘sexual body part’ in general terms. The trouble with that definition is it presupposes that when it comes to sex there is a concept of what is ‘normal’… there isn’t.
FGM: Female Genital Mutilation
Sometimes also referred to as female circumcision. This illegal practice involves a girl having either her clitoris cut away, or her clitoris and vaginal lips (labia) – the parts of a woman that give sexual pleasure. Sometimes it also includes the vaginal opening being sewed together as well.
This is a cultural practice, not a religious one. FGM is illegal in this country and outlawed by the UN.
To find out more about FGM
Fingering
Is pretty much as it sounds – generally used to describe manual sex (using your hands or fingers) to stimulate a female partner. However, many guys have the mistaken impression that this involves stuffing as many fingers inside your partner as possible as if she is some sort of glove puppet! However, if they bothered to take some time to understand a bit more about female anatomy they would discover that all the nice bits tend to be on the outside of the vulva (Changes for Girls).
Fisting
Is the practice of inserting your whole hand inside a partner’s vagina or anus. As a term it sounds like quite a violent act, however, when done properly it takes a huge amount of patience, lube and trust to be able to perform this very intimate act properly without hurting your partner.
However, it should be noted that if done without care fisting can be painful and cause internal damage. Indeed, some pornography that features fisting is considered to be ‘extreme’ pornography and is illegal to own or distribute (that includes showing, sending an email or sms to a mate) due to this fact.
Flaccid
A word which is usually used to refer to a floppy (unerect) penis.
Also known as
Floppy
Flashing
The act of exposing oneself in public. Either getting your boobs, bums (often called ‘mooning’) or genitals out in public.
Foreplay
Is a word used to describe all the fun stuff that people do before having penetrative sex. Unfortunately, many people seem to see foreplay as merely the warm up for having ‘real sex’ – which is a shame as actually all the stuff we lump under the heading ‘foreplay’ can actually be more pleasurable than merely penetration and is just as important.
Foreskin
Is the flap of skin which covers the sensitive head of a guy’s penis. This is what is removed in a circumcision.
Find out more about Changes for Boys.
Frenulum
Is the little stringy cord that runs under the head of a guy’s penis, which attaches the foreskin. (You have another one in your mouth, it anchors your tongue in your mouth – look in a mirror and lift your tongue up to see!)
Find out more about Changes for Boys.
Also known as
Banjo String
Frotteurism
Is a fetish for rubbing yourself up against unsuspecting people on public transport. This is illegal and is considered to be a sexual assault
Frotting
Is the sexual act of two men rubbing/grinding against each other whilst naked. The female version is known as tribbing.
Also known as
Cock Fencing
Fuck
Often used as a swear and a less polite form of saying ‘oh deary me!’ Alternatively used as an insult – however it’s just another word for having sex.